Suburban Progressives Throwing Stones from their Cul-de-sacs (Personal Story)
The good majority of people I know in life are in favor of gay marriage, they tolerate me. We disagree, but they don’t treat me like a bigot or an idiot. Due to local politics we tend to be Democrats, and just simply follow party lines. Maybe I will get ribbed at most. Still these people let me in their homes and they don’t taunt me or isolate me. I always keep that in my heart and on my mind, whenever I’m provoked online.
In many ways I still see myself as a democrat in regards to the poor and environmental issues, even though I’ve refrain from voting for that party. I also agree with many of their sentiments and concerns regarding protection of sexual orientation, but not at the risk of losing the laws that promote individuals to have stability in their childhood; meaning to have a relationship with their mother and father. You know… that thing we called marriage.
Something gets me, emotionally. I live in a city with the typical problems that affect cities both socially and with infrastructure. People are mobile and it’s easy to move off from the suburbs to avoid all of the problems that do exist here. I can’t fault people for wanting to live in ‘a good neighborhood’. Still I love living in this city, I can’t imagine moving anywhere else. I get defensive, this is home. I want my city to be ‘a good neighborhood’, just without major gentrification.
Well an acquaintance that lives in the suburbs outside of my city, posted something about gay marriage on Facebook. It inferred that those who aren’t in favor, we’re idiots. I didn’t want to start a debate on her wall, so instead I sent a private message. I told her that I wasn’t sending her a message to change her mind, but rather it hurt me to think she thought I was an idiot to defend marriage. I wanted to put a knowing face to the other side of the argument.
Yes, I made reference to some of the arguments. Specifically the fatherhood crisis right here in the city and the increase chances of poverty for mother and children who do not have the father in the home equally being there. Essentially all of the reasons why people move out of the city, which is family breakdown, reduces the well-being of the our neighborhoods.
No response.
Thirty-six hours later completely defriended and blocked, despite earlier this week prior she made some friendly comments on my own Facebook wall.
When you only desire to live in a solely traditional affluent family setting, while claiming to be liberal on marriage, please don’t publicly post cartoons that people who think differently are idiots. The hetero-normative lifestyle of marriage is requirement for where you raise your children, but we can’t desire the same because we didn’t choose to live in ‘a good neighborhood’ and turn a blind eye from the social consequences of broken homes.
It doesn't matter how liberal you may think or vote only for Democrats; ultimately you’re a closeted right-winger and behave in the direct opposite that claim to believe. If you choose to move to a town that’s 96% white, and that has above average SAT scores where only 2% of students qualify for free lunch, what conclusions should I draw? You live in a town, where there is no public housing or homeless shelter. The only access to ‘public transportation’ is a private commuter bus to Boston off the highway exit, again what conclusions? You’re the same individual that pays thousands of dollars more in property taxes to keep ‘the local public schools good’, when the real intent is to keep poor (dysfunctional) families out, and only thing your willing to publicly fund for the poor is more birth-control and abortion. As you say, ‘I moved here for a reason.’
Please spare the categorizing of me and others as uncaring bigots, as you pretend to be tolerant and diverse in your chosen homogeneous life. If you want to pride yourself as progressive liberal and spout off those ideals to the people you know, then live in the city with all of the problems you rather not deal with on a daily basis. You can’t choose to live in the suburbs and claim to be a progressive, simply by calling people dirty names from the safety of your protective cul-de-sacs.
Renee Aste
Lowell, Massachusetts
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