Such caricatures of male aggressiveness tell us little about the significant biological differences between men and women, but the unintended consequences of the sexual revolution, for all of its enabling advantages for women, also enable men to be boys for a long time, if not forever. Girls must put off womanhood whether they like it or not. Courtship is coarsened, and babies still need daddies. Alas, there's no modern fairy tale about the woman who breaks the glass ceiling with the spike heel of a glass slipper, the gift of a princely man.
You should read the whole exchange...
Very grateful to have a completely supportive husband--loyal, hard-working, committed, kind--I could go on and on. I'm so grateful to be married to a man who is such a good role-model for my boys, and a standard for manhood for my daughters, when they look to choosing their own spouses, someday. Frankly, my husband makes a much better father than I do. . . .
ReplyDeleteWhile I agree with a lot of your points, I think it's perfectly fine for a woman to be more educated and earn more than her husband. I suspect that most of these women were achieving this before they got married and were preparing to be self-sufficient in the event they do not get the right opportunity. While I am very lucky to be wed to the good man, not all women are this fortunate and should not be accused of being "picky." Implying that a single woman should just settle for anyone severely reduces her self worth and would probably hurt the marriage.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I believe that a successful, educated wife makes a better husband and gives their kids certain advantages that a hastily married girl with little education cannot. My parents are a good example. My dad lost his job in this recession and had a lot of trouble finding another. If it wasn't for my mom's education and employment, they would've lost everything. My dad was grateful that my mom could do this, not resentful, and he certainly didn't withdraw his "pursuit of educational, occupational or fatherhood opportunities" because of her success. Personally, I think a man who reacts this way out of intimidation of a woman's successes has some issues.
I think the author wouldn't disagree.
ReplyDeleteI think the worry is that there are certain enablers out there who help men be under-achievers. I doubt that is the case with your parents, for instance.